Her name was Alabama yet she was born and raised in Hebron Connecticut, and had never stepped foot outside of New England. It wasn't that her parents were from the south, or that they collected southern things, or enjoyed southern based movies, or even had any friends with southern accents. It wasn't even warm or sunny the day she was born, in fact she was born in the middle of a snow storm, and they don't even get snow in Alabama, or do they? Well anyhow, it was the nonsensical name they dubbed this poor infant that generated a prophecy for her to evolve into a very nonsensical girl. It was at 5 months she learned to walk backwards, and it was at 9 months she learned to crawl forward. It was clear to her parents, doctors, and folks all around her that Alabama was going to become a very special person.
By the time she reached elementary school she could read and write which lead many to believe she was destined for greatness. Perhaps, some thought, she was given a name that didn't make sense, and now she was determined to make something out of herself despite it. She was possibly more eager than most to make sense out of the world around her. It was also when she entered elementary school that teachers began to prod her with questions about the origin of her name, "Alabama! What a beautiful name, were you born there? Did your parents come from there?" Or prod her with corny remarks in butchered southern drawls "Well hellllllo thur little ms. Ala bam ma, the heart of dixie! Aren't you a little spe shell garl!" Other children noticed the special attention her name awarded her and whenever a child is singled out in front of other children by an adult, what usually takes place is a lot of insult and slander to compensate for the lack of attention they are getting. So this is what happened, Alabama became the number one target for irrational or some might say nonsensical bullying my Jonathans, Jessicas, and Roberts. They called her ugly, though she was actually quite handsome, they called her a big fat cow, though she was quite petite, and they even called her a sissy pissy pants because eventually the torment got so incredibly scary it caused her to wet her pants with anxiety whenever a Jess, Jon, or Rob came her way at Recess.
So you may begin to wonder if Alabama continued to excel academically despite such social hardships, and you may be wrong if you think this tough little cookie couldn't handle a little bullying. After teachers recognized her advanced reading and writing skills they bumped her along through elementary school in half the pace of most children. Without many friends to distract her from her studies, she quickly mastered basic math functions and was ready to move on to high school before the age of 11.
Alabama's first year of high school went swimmingly, she hardly noticed other students and concentrated on her academics which landed her into advanced college credited classes in her sophomore year. It was right around this time, whether it be the pressure of challenging work at such a young age, or the sprouting of pubic hairs, and racing hormones, but our pour Alabama began to feel very uncomfortable in her own skin. Turning a deaf ear to other students since her bullied days, she was too socially awkward and unprepared to make the girlfriends she needed for this emotionally difficult and undefinable time in her life. She was however, able to strike an acquaintanceship with a young man named Ocean, after he leaned over to her in Calculus 101 on a Tuesday and asked her tutor him that following Wednesday afternoon. During their fourth tutoring session he asked the inevitable questions about her name which lead her to act out a surprising drama of anger and disgust in which she told him: "I didn't pick this goddamn name, and I sure as hell don't know why my fucken parents did! Why don't you come over and fucken ask THEM!" To which Ocean calmly and coolly replied, "So your inviting me over?" After all, he was a 15 year old teenager with raging hormones of his own.
So Alabama invited Ocean over and their acquaintanceship skipped friendship and quickly progressed into, well, sex. That's right, pour 13 year old Alabama, all she had to hear was Ocean's own pathetic story of how embarrassed he was of his own name and she unzipped her pants. The truth was Ocean never was ridiculed for his name. It just so happened that during the time he was in elementary school a very popular super hero named "Ocean Brights" was the star of all his friend's imaginations. "Ocean Brights" had his own television show, action figure, wardrobe, and birthday party themes. So it just so happened that Ocean was destined for popularity by association of a popular kid's superhero figure. Ocean was proud of his name; showing off his dimples during every first day of class, charmingly, yet purposely reluctantly disclosing that his name was "like that superhero we were all obsessed with as kids, Ocean" So you may be developing the picture, that this Ocean guy wasn't going to turn into Alabama's boyfriend and your picture would be right. After their third romp Alabama told Ocean she loved him for exactly who he was, and he told her it wasn't going to work out. The next day Alabama stopped eating and Ocean dropped out of her Calculus class and began dating a senior.
The next few years were turbulent, her school grades began to plummet and as I stated earlier, she stopped eating which forced her to spend some time in an Eating Disorder unit of her local hospital for a few years off and on. By the time she had become stable enough to return to high school, she had reached her senior year and the rest of the kids she had left behind in elementary school had caught up. All of them remembered her, who could forget a name like Alabama? No longer a gifted student, Alabama spent her last year taking average level classes and smoking pot after school with a freshmen boy named Leroy.
Alabama managed to graduate but never applied to college. She packed up her childhood room, donated everything to Goodwill, and moved into her parent's basement which had it's own private door and a half finished bathroom. She dated a guy at the door of a local pub and began spending her nights there, collecting friends with drugs and no inhibition to judge her. Eventually she moved out of her parent's bedroom with that bouncer from the pub, he got her a job as a waitress and she made pretty good tips on the weekends.
One night a friend of there's introduced her to heroin, it made her feel so good she didn't want to eat, which was perfect because even though she had been given a clean bill of health from the hospital years prior, she had never fully gotten over her distorted body image issues. So she stopped eating again, and the bouncer boyfriend grew angry and he had issues of his own, so he began to hit her. But she didn't snap out of it, she grew sick and thin, and bruised, and then she didn't ask for help, and neither did the bouncer boyfriend because he didn't want to be sent to jail for domestic abuse.
What about the parents who gave her the name? I forgot to mention a long time ago that when Alabama was 9 her mother found 32 erotic email exchanges between her father and a woman named Gloria. Instead of confronting him, her mother decided to launch her own very loud affair with her barley legal personal trainer. It wasn't until her mother unexpectedly dropped by Alabama's apartment on a Sunday morning to announce that she was divorcing her father that she found Alabama sitting in a pile of cereal on the kitchen floor with a needle sticking out of her right arm, a bottle of gin clenched in her left hand, and her eyes rolled back into her head, that she got the help she needed. She had overdosed and would have died right there surrounded by lucky charms and split milk if it wasn't for the curtain closing on her parent's marriage.
Alabama was admitted to an intensive inpatient drug and alcohol rehabilitation program which specialized in women with eating disorders. She was granted extended stay after 90 days and left 6 months later a new woman. Equipped with new coping skills, appropriate doctor prescribed psychotropic medication, and a new outlook on life, she marched down to the town hall and changed her first name to Jessica. She then began to write a memoir documenting her struggles with bullying, drugs, eating disorders, and abuse. Her book was recognized as a best seller, making her enough money to pursue college at last and eventually become an AA-going, healthy 138 lb English professor. During holiday break one year she was invited to a literary convention for progressive English professors, but quickly declined the RSVP which happened to be addressed from Montgomery.
