Monday at the office and it is like I cant get there soon enough, cant get away from my shitty two days off at home faster. My partner and secretary are groaning about the monday blues and I am all smiles because I know its only a matter of an hour or two before my appointment with Stephanie, before I get to fuck away my sad pathetic weekend. Chuck sends me a text message around 9am (most likely idling at the airport) "send me a pic of Stephanies tits" that is the friend I know. Hes making up for being such a sentimental caring asshole.
11 oclock rolls around and the secretary is buzzing Stephanie into my office. Shes wearing black skinny jeans, a skin tight t-shirt in November and reeks of prepubescent perfume.
"Hey sexy"
"Hey Baby, I was thinking did you wanna get moving at all with this case against your ex?" Its what originally brought her sweet pussy to my office three months ago. She was seeking counsel to file a lawsuit against her ex who broke into her house and kidnapped her Doberman a week after they had broke up.
"I think I still need some consultation" she comes close to me and pushes her torso into mine.
"Alright, well let me see what kind of service I can offer you today" I say as I unzip her pants.
In a matter of seconds shes bent over my desk like last Friday only this time their is nothing stopping us. She's moaning into my desk and I cum so hard I practically fall over.
"Told you I'd make it up to you" I tell her as I toss her pants to her.
"Yeah thanks for the 10 seconds of paradise"
"Give me a break, we never finished Friday and I didn't have a chance to jerk off this weekend, I've been hard for days"
"Alright, alright, hey I did call it paradise didn't I?"
I kiss her on the neck and tell her to schedule another appointment with Rena my secretary.
She walks out the door without saying goodbye and for the first time I wonder where she is going home to, and if there will be anyone there to take her to paradise for longer tonight.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
god rant
It's unhealthy to believe in God, no not unhealthy, well yes unhealthy, mentally it is unhealthy to believe in God. You go through life believing in God and before you know it you're using up huge chunks of your life siting in a pew with your palms pressed together asking for forgiveness for lying to your stocky neighbor about your lawn mower, it's not broken, he could have used it, your a paranoid self centered bastard, you didn't think you'd get the thing back. You sit there in that pew you get so wound up, you're sweating, you're stomach is turning, you've broken so many secular laws, eventually you're begging to be forgiven for the shit you're about to take on the floor. Wait, no this isn't what I mean at all, forget it, go on believe in God, it does not really matter. It is perfectly okay to believe in God in moderation. Yes, moderation is the key, you know, throw a few Benjamins to the church on Easter, attend Christmas eve midnight mass, follow the thou shall not kill and thous shall not fuck my neighboor's spouse, and good, okay. M o d e r a t i o n. Because lets face it, you make God and Jesus and Mary the center of your little world and bam you'll have problems. No sex before marriage for you and then you get caught getting off to animal porn at 3 o'clock in the morning and suddenly that fiance of yours is calling off the wedding. And you were so close to having the real thing. No, you do not want that. Wait, no this isn't where I was trying to go with this. It basically comes down to intelligence, if you're smart, I mean if you're not the kind of person who gets into many fender benders, if you're not someone who sits in front of the boob tube with their mouth hanging open and druel dribbling to the floor, no, no, no this isn't where I am trying to go but anyway, if you're smart, you don't and you won't believe in God, and well if you're a complete and utter dumbass (excuse any of my American word blunder) then let thy HIM be your savior. NPR told me so. No it wasn't NPR it was Psychology Today, the magazine. It revealed a study which correlated High IQ's with Atheism and then pointed to congress who have all proudly boasted their beliefs in intelligent design. Hahaha. But, but, but as we must remember to take a look at, as scholars. Psychology Today is a product of the scientific world and in the science vs. church battle it is all too likely that they would publish such a correlation.
BUT/AND
How many bible thumpers and members of congress can you think of that you would deam geniuses?
Okay, I am being a little pretentious
BUT/AND
How many bible thumpers and members of congress can you think of that you would deam geniuses?
Okay, I am being a little pretentious
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Continuing with lets call it story X
Lisa was passed out on the couch like I had suspected with her laptop at her feet. I laid a blanket over her body and kissed her forehead in a small selfish attempt to wake her. I missed her, I wanted to hold her in my arms and hear her talk like the way she use to, I wanted to hear her tell me silly stories about her day and joke with me about my work endeavors. I wanted to fantasize about having kids with her again and how they would grow up to be punks who sat in their rooms listening to loud uncompromisable noises booming from their computer stereos with big long necks like hers. "We are going to have giraffes for kids I hope you know" she'd joke and wildly extend her neck to illustrate. Her neck was perfect actually, smooth and soft like the rest of her body, I missed touching her with my lips. I missed everything about that beautiful woman which was now not much more than a pile of bones and rotting teeth, wrapped up in fetal position who reeked of marijuana. I probably will not have any kids.
I went out back to work on an old 1957 ford mustang Lisa's dad handed down to me. It was in pretty bad shape and I was not much into renovating automobiles, I hardly knew anything about them in general, but since Lisa came down with cancer I found myself having plenty necessity for a distracting hobby. I pulled out my handy dandy Rebuilding Classic Mustangs For Dummies book (now a big fan of the series) and got underway. Before I knew it, it was well past super time and the sun had set. The house was dark, Lisa was still asleep. She probably hadn't eaten anything for hours so I fixed her some chicken, rice, and broccoli and she spent several hours until midnight throwing it up.
I had stopped believing in God since the day Lisa got sick. To tell you the truth, I was a fairly noble catholic before hand. My father raised me to introduce myself as Irish Catholic to everyone I came across in life, he said it was the only two principle things that mattered about a person, if they were Irish and if they were Catholic. I use to attend church on Sunday's and even got Lisa to come on Easter and Christmas Eve Midnight Mass, she herself was, is, an agnostic as I now proudly am. I just cannot believe in a god that would rape a man of astonishing happiness and a woman of her dignity, and her soul. It's also why I fuck Stephanie, fuck God and his commandments, he doesn't exist, and neither does his church, or the vows I protested under "his witness", fuck it all really.
Sunday went pretty similarly as Saturday. Lisa smoking, playing games on her laptop, and sleeping, me attempting to work on that mustang. At one point I went for a long jog and decided on buying a dog, I was so excited I ran in the door, showered like a hot date was waiting to fuck me, and flew out the door without an explanation (not like Lisa was probably even aware of my haste).
She was a beau, I saw her right away. I was at the Candlestick Kennel in Hebron and her little sad face was poking out between the cage bars and her tale was wagging anxiously for me to come over and see her. The kennel had named her Lucky, a tag on the cage explained she was found outside in a dumpster, only a few feet away from the kennel. Some jackass, couldn't at least drop the pup off inside? Some fucking people, I just don't understand. I knew she was the one, she was a mixed mut, not a purebred that was for sure, she had brown and black markings all over her body and one black spot right over her mouth which made her look like she had finished off a bowl or two of chocolate pudding. She had long legs, a short body, and huge paws. I could tell she'd grow up to be a good medium sized dog, big enough to take with me on jogs and hikes. I was sold, her brown puppy eyes knew she had gotten me. I payed 30 bucks for her and proudly brought my pup home. I could hardly contain my excitement on the drive home anticipating what Lisa would say. "Oh Jamie! She's perfect! She'll be my new friend to help take care of me when you are at work!" I couldn't wait.
When I arrived back home I let Lucky slip through the door first and find Lisa who was in her usual spot fast asleep. Lucky jumped on the sofa excitedly and began licking her face. I was beaming with happiness, this was perfect already.
"Jamie? What is this?" she groaned.
"It's our new puppy hunny! Isn't she cute? I just rescued her from Candlestick Kennel"
Lisa picked up her body and pushed Lucky away "Hunny we can't have a dog, you know that, what did you do this for?" her eyes refused to meet mine, she talked at the dog.
"What do you mean Lisa?" I sat beside her on the couch and took Lucky in my lap. "She'll be our new friend! She'll keep you company when I am at work and I'll take her for long jogs and hikes when I am home."
Lisa slinked back down into the couch, heavy with exhaustion and closed her eyes. "Jamie, take her back, you know I can't take care of a puppy"
"Yes you can Lisa, it will be no work at all."
"Jamie" she sat up again, angry this time. "I don't have the energy to take care of a dog, what is wrong with you? How the fuck do you expect me to potty train him or feed him, or clean up after him when he's bad?"
"It's a her, Lucky is a girl and so just try the best you can, and don't worry I can clean up after her when I get home from work and on the weekends Ill concentrate on training her, you won't hardly have to do a thing, please Lisa. This will be good for us. Lucky wants to be our friend, look how sweet she is" I placed her in Lisa's lap and she began licking her face wildly.
"Jamie!" Lisa moaned and pushed the puppy away almost knocking her off the sofa entirely. "Take her back now"
An order, Lisa was giving me an order. Lisa was entitled to order me around, she was sick, and her word was the ultimate decision.
Lucky was licking my hand and squirming in my lap. Before I could take her outside and run around with her I was putting her in the backseat of the car and driving her back to Hebron. The owner of the kennel joked that maybe she wasn't too lucky. But I said I hoped she would be, she really was a wonderful dog even for the few short hours I knew her.
I went out back to work on an old 1957 ford mustang Lisa's dad handed down to me. It was in pretty bad shape and I was not much into renovating automobiles, I hardly knew anything about them in general, but since Lisa came down with cancer I found myself having plenty necessity for a distracting hobby. I pulled out my handy dandy Rebuilding Classic Mustangs For Dummies book (now a big fan of the series) and got underway. Before I knew it, it was well past super time and the sun had set. The house was dark, Lisa was still asleep. She probably hadn't eaten anything for hours so I fixed her some chicken, rice, and broccoli and she spent several hours until midnight throwing it up.
I had stopped believing in God since the day Lisa got sick. To tell you the truth, I was a fairly noble catholic before hand. My father raised me to introduce myself as Irish Catholic to everyone I came across in life, he said it was the only two principle things that mattered about a person, if they were Irish and if they were Catholic. I use to attend church on Sunday's and even got Lisa to come on Easter and Christmas Eve Midnight Mass, she herself was, is, an agnostic as I now proudly am. I just cannot believe in a god that would rape a man of astonishing happiness and a woman of her dignity, and her soul. It's also why I fuck Stephanie, fuck God and his commandments, he doesn't exist, and neither does his church, or the vows I protested under "his witness", fuck it all really.
Sunday went pretty similarly as Saturday. Lisa smoking, playing games on her laptop, and sleeping, me attempting to work on that mustang. At one point I went for a long jog and decided on buying a dog, I was so excited I ran in the door, showered like a hot date was waiting to fuck me, and flew out the door without an explanation (not like Lisa was probably even aware of my haste).
She was a beau, I saw her right away. I was at the Candlestick Kennel in Hebron and her little sad face was poking out between the cage bars and her tale was wagging anxiously for me to come over and see her. The kennel had named her Lucky, a tag on the cage explained she was found outside in a dumpster, only a few feet away from the kennel. Some jackass, couldn't at least drop the pup off inside? Some fucking people, I just don't understand. I knew she was the one, she was a mixed mut, not a purebred that was for sure, she had brown and black markings all over her body and one black spot right over her mouth which made her look like she had finished off a bowl or two of chocolate pudding. She had long legs, a short body, and huge paws. I could tell she'd grow up to be a good medium sized dog, big enough to take with me on jogs and hikes. I was sold, her brown puppy eyes knew she had gotten me. I payed 30 bucks for her and proudly brought my pup home. I could hardly contain my excitement on the drive home anticipating what Lisa would say. "Oh Jamie! She's perfect! She'll be my new friend to help take care of me when you are at work!" I couldn't wait.
When I arrived back home I let Lucky slip through the door first and find Lisa who was in her usual spot fast asleep. Lucky jumped on the sofa excitedly and began licking her face. I was beaming with happiness, this was perfect already.
"Jamie? What is this?" she groaned.
"It's our new puppy hunny! Isn't she cute? I just rescued her from Candlestick Kennel"
Lisa picked up her body and pushed Lucky away "Hunny we can't have a dog, you know that, what did you do this for?" her eyes refused to meet mine, she talked at the dog.
"What do you mean Lisa?" I sat beside her on the couch and took Lucky in my lap. "She'll be our new friend! She'll keep you company when I am at work and I'll take her for long jogs and hikes when I am home."
Lisa slinked back down into the couch, heavy with exhaustion and closed her eyes. "Jamie, take her back, you know I can't take care of a puppy"
"Yes you can Lisa, it will be no work at all."
"Jamie" she sat up again, angry this time. "I don't have the energy to take care of a dog, what is wrong with you? How the fuck do you expect me to potty train him or feed him, or clean up after him when he's bad?"
"It's a her, Lucky is a girl and so just try the best you can, and don't worry I can clean up after her when I get home from work and on the weekends Ill concentrate on training her, you won't hardly have to do a thing, please Lisa. This will be good for us. Lucky wants to be our friend, look how sweet she is" I placed her in Lisa's lap and she began licking her face wildly.
"Jamie!" Lisa moaned and pushed the puppy away almost knocking her off the sofa entirely. "Take her back now"
An order, Lisa was giving me an order. Lisa was entitled to order me around, she was sick, and her word was the ultimate decision.
Lucky was licking my hand and squirming in my lap. Before I could take her outside and run around with her I was putting her in the backseat of the car and driving her back to Hebron. The owner of the kennel joked that maybe she wasn't too lucky. But I said I hoped she would be, she really was a wonderful dog even for the few short hours I knew her.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Brain Train
I am waiting to use the bathroom, to brush my teeth before I go to sleep. My step dad is soaking his aching bones, his throbbing joints in a bath. It is what retired custodians do, they lie in tubs and soak at night. I am thinking about how I am where I never thought I would be a year ago, incredibly in love and certain of my romantic fate, still working part time at GNC, embarrassed, idling before I start school in January to become a drug & alcohol recovery counselor, and anticipating the arrival of my nephew, the launching of a whole new learning process: how to take care of and raise a child. I am thinking about how I have to pick up my birth control tomorrow, how it is going to cost me a few dollars, how I spent a lot of money I really do not have this weekend, but I am also smiling about it because it was worth it. I am looking around my room and feeling anxious, I need to clean, reorganize, and create more peace in here. It is cluttered, it is full of teenage memorabilia, the walls are shouting, crying, smiling, and its all happening at once, its all a mess. I am thinking about the love of my life, thinking how its the best gift life could have given me, how I will not dare ask for anything else from full moons, shooting stars, magic lamps and their genie keepers, how this is completing, and makes everything worth wild. I am thinking about October, the trees that vibrate just a bit louder with color each day, how I am hungry for every drive, run, or ride in the fall. I am thinking about indulgence and the necessity of sleep, its time to grow up, why am I still sleeping til noon? Should I get a second job to pay off my schooling or to save money for a reckless trip? Should I manifest Hemmingway and Karoachs wild minded words? Should I live a rendition? Will I ever become compliant of the machine or will I become a professional student? Can I accept that their will be a time where my husband and I will work long weeks, sleep short nights, and only spend time with eachother and our children on the weekends? We will be tired. But its him, and it will be worth wild, thank you, thank you, thank you universe. My heart beats again, it beats louder.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Story Continued, see previous entry before reading this one
When I pop into Chuck's condo and he is doing exactly what he said he was doing, watching mud wrestling. He offers me a beer and a seat on his brand new classy leather couch. "What is this pleather?" I tease.
"Fuck you." He loves it when I make fun of his pricey accessories.
"So what's up man, how's the beautiful wife? Is she feeling any better yet?" I always feel uncomfortable when he asks me serious questions, when he's serious in general. I don't shoot the shit with him to be serious and talk about my wife and cancer.
"She's okay, good days and bad days. Nice flat screen man, you know that thing is gonna burn a whole through your wall in a year."
"You're wrong fuckbag, these things have fans now." He really loves it when I make fun of his pricey accessories.
"How was your last trip? Bang any nice ones?"
"Always man, this one girl I was with on Saturday night in Chicago had her clit pierced man, believe it or not I have never seen that shit before. Sketched me out a bit cause I thought damn this chick might be a stripper and if so maybe she could have had something, but I'm not pissing blood yet."
"Stephanie has her clit pierced, I love it, makes her cum pretty easily when I play with it, makes me wild"
Then suddenly he does something very unexpected, he turns off his television, his mud wrestling. "Who the fuck is Stephanie?" He's angry too.
"This girl I am seeing on the side, turn the T.V. back on man"
"You're screwing around on Lisa? Why the hell would you do that?"
"Wow, this is coming from you? Stop looking at me like that Chuck, I can't believe you are getting pissed at this, man you had two girlfriends once!"
"Yes, and they knew about eachother Jamie, besides I am me, and those girls were just broads. This is you and this is Lisa we are talking about. Damn Jamie, how could you be fucking around on Lisa? And while she's going through Cancer? What the hell is wrong with you? Didn't those vows mean anything to you?" I couldn't believe Chuck was saying this to me, I couldn't believe the man who fucks beautiful and decent women every weekend and never calls them, the man who was probably spreading herpes all over the god damn nation was giving me shit for this.
"Fuck you man, I am outta here"
"Hey Jamie, alright, don't get all heated just tell me what's going on, just tell me about this Stephanie chick and how she blows Lisa out of the fucken water okay?"
But I didn't want to tell him anything, I wanted to tell him how good her pussy felt and maybe go out for a drink and shoot the shit about the Yankees and check out women at a bar. I did not want to tell him that Stephanie was a former client of mine with not much more than a high school education, that fucking her was the blur of ecstasy I needed to get stay with my beautiful, intellectual wife that no longer fucked me nor talked to me, and only needed her pot through the cancer except when she was afraid of chocking on her vomit.
"Bye man." I left without telling him anything, fuck him. He was suppose to be my best friend, someone I didn't have to explain anything to, fuck.
"Whatever, call me next weekend I'll be in L.A. all week."
I had no real choice except to return home, all my other friends were our friends. Lisa and mine, they would flood me with questions and concerns and depress the hell outta be if I tried to spend any time with them.
"Fuck you." He loves it when I make fun of his pricey accessories.
"So what's up man, how's the beautiful wife? Is she feeling any better yet?" I always feel uncomfortable when he asks me serious questions, when he's serious in general. I don't shoot the shit with him to be serious and talk about my wife and cancer.
"She's okay, good days and bad days. Nice flat screen man, you know that thing is gonna burn a whole through your wall in a year."
"You're wrong fuckbag, these things have fans now." He really loves it when I make fun of his pricey accessories.
"How was your last trip? Bang any nice ones?"
"Always man, this one girl I was with on Saturday night in Chicago had her clit pierced man, believe it or not I have never seen that shit before. Sketched me out a bit cause I thought damn this chick might be a stripper and if so maybe she could have had something, but I'm not pissing blood yet."
"Stephanie has her clit pierced, I love it, makes her cum pretty easily when I play with it, makes me wild"
Then suddenly he does something very unexpected, he turns off his television, his mud wrestling. "Who the fuck is Stephanie?" He's angry too.
"This girl I am seeing on the side, turn the T.V. back on man"
"You're screwing around on Lisa? Why the hell would you do that?"
"Wow, this is coming from you? Stop looking at me like that Chuck, I can't believe you are getting pissed at this, man you had two girlfriends once!"
"Yes, and they knew about eachother Jamie, besides I am me, and those girls were just broads. This is you and this is Lisa we are talking about. Damn Jamie, how could you be fucking around on Lisa? And while she's going through Cancer? What the hell is wrong with you? Didn't those vows mean anything to you?" I couldn't believe Chuck was saying this to me, I couldn't believe the man who fucks beautiful and decent women every weekend and never calls them, the man who was probably spreading herpes all over the god damn nation was giving me shit for this.
"Fuck you man, I am outta here"
"Hey Jamie, alright, don't get all heated just tell me what's going on, just tell me about this Stephanie chick and how she blows Lisa out of the fucken water okay?"
But I didn't want to tell him anything, I wanted to tell him how good her pussy felt and maybe go out for a drink and shoot the shit about the Yankees and check out women at a bar. I did not want to tell him that Stephanie was a former client of mine with not much more than a high school education, that fucking her was the blur of ecstasy I needed to get stay with my beautiful, intellectual wife that no longer fucked me nor talked to me, and only needed her pot through the cancer except when she was afraid of chocking on her vomit.
"Bye man." I left without telling him anything, fuck him. He was suppose to be my best friend, someone I didn't have to explain anything to, fuck.
"Whatever, call me next weekend I'll be in L.A. all week."
I had no real choice except to return home, all my other friends were our friends. Lisa and mine, they would flood me with questions and concerns and depress the hell outta be if I tried to spend any time with them.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Her legs are wrapped around my back, she's lying on my work desk moaning and groping her tits, I am just about to cum when the phone rings.
"Damnit, I have to get that" I pull out of her tight pussy and grab the phone.
"What the f..." I slap my hand over her face and whisper "shhhhhh!"
"Good afternoon Law Offices of Mac and O'Riley"
"Hunny?" It's Lisa.
"Hey hunny are you okay?"
"No, Jamie can you please come home? It's real bad and I am scared, I don't want to be alone." She puts down the phone to yak into the toilet something fierce.
"Of course. I'll leave right away, I love you." I hang up the phone and grab my coat.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" My girlfriend Stephanie can be a real bitch.
"What do you think I'm doing? My wife is having a bad day, I have to go."
"So you're just going to leave me still wetting my pants?" God, I love it when she talks like that, I'm still hard and all I wanna do is lay her across my desk and finish fucking her.
"I'm sorry, you know I'll make it up to you" I leave her in my office and walk out the door.
I arrive home and Lisa's choking on her vomit, I panic but she relieves herself before I have to jam my fingers down her throat and scoop out the bile. She looks at me with those big brown apologetic eyes, god can those eyes still kill. I stroke her skeletal back and whip the sweat from her brows, and tell her she's going to be okay. An hour later their is nothing left and she is weak and nodding off to sleep. I pick her up and lay her down on the couch where I can keep an eye on her while I fix some vegetable soup. I get a call from the doctor who asks how she's feeling after her treatment. "Fucken horrible, she just puked for an hour and now she's too weak to stay awake" I am frustrated, tired, and agitated by my blue balls, I take it out on him. He's use to it and just tells me what he always says, to keep her hydrated and fed. Sounds easy coming from him.
Lisa wakes up long enough to make a deal with me, she'll sip half a bowl of soup and a full glass of water and I'll rub her back and sing our wedding song while she falls asleep. She smiles at me but I have to look away, her teeth are stained and beginning to rot. She picks up on it and tells me when she beats the cancer she's going to get beautiful veneers. That girl always picks up on everything, she use to be able to tell what kind of day I had just by the greeting I'd give her when I came home every day after work. When we were kids I'll never forget the time we were waking through the mall and all I did was glance at this guitar in the window of a music shop and during Christmas she bought it for me along with a Guitar for Dummys book. She said I made this funny sigh when I saw it that day in the mall like "man I wish I could learn how to play guitar." By Valentine's Day I had learned how to play a decent song and I dedicated to her and played it for her at a cheesy open mic night at a local venue. She loved it so much she insisted it become our wedding song, god it was so easy to please that girl, this girl.
Saturday morning comes and I sleep in until I hear the doorbell at 11. I glance over and Lisa isn't beside me, I listen for a moment and I hear her heading to the door.
"Chase, come on in" it's fucken Chase.
"Hey Lisa, how's it going, you look pretty good." I'm guessing she must have her blonde wig on, God dammit do I hate that thing.
"Oh, thanks, not feeling so hot after chemo yesterday but thanks. Do you want anything to eat or drink?"
"No, no, I'm good actually, is Jamie home? His car is outside."
"Yeah, he's still asleep actually believe it or not, I bet he'd love to see you though, do you want me to go grab him?" No actually I wouldn't love to see him, I beg to christ she doesn't start calling my name.
"No, no, that's okay, I gotta get going anyway, I am meeting someone for lunch. You can just tell him I said hi. How much did you say you wanted again?"
"Just the same as last time, same price right?"
"This stuff is from Vermont but for you I'll keep it at the same price" How nice of him.
"Thanks Chase, I appreciate it."
"Alright, well I hope you start feeling better, call me if you need anything"
"Oh I will, thanks Chase, you outta come by for dinner sometime when I am feeling a little more stable, you can bring a girl too if you're seeing anyone."
"Okay, yeah" I imagine their hugging about now.
"Thanks again, see ya"
"Peace"
I roll out of bed and jog downstairs before she can hide away her pot. I don't want her to escape any guilt. "Your drug dealer just come by?"
"Jamie, it was Chase, he's not my drug dealer, he's our friend"
"Your friend, not mine anymore, not my friend since we were kids." I enter the kitchen and start making breakfast.
"Come on Jamie, this stuff really helps, you know that. I hardly have an appetite without it, and it calms my stomach" She wraps her arms around me and hugs my back.
"You don't need pot Lisa. I got you to eat yesterday and you didn't even yak it back up."
"Yeah hunny but that was after I spent the entire afternoon yaking already" she reaches in a kitchen drawer and pulls out a bowl to pack her pot in. She retreats to the outside back patio to smoke and I surrender the discussion to a bowl of oatmeal.
When she returns she eats a bowl of cereal and a banana and forgets to engage in conversation. We sit silent at the kitchen table. I clean the dishes when we are both finished while she plops herself down on the sofa couch and plays a game on her laptop. She doesn't speak, she doesn't move, she doesn't hear me when I ask her to go for a walk. I put on some gym shorts, go for a long jog and think about fucking Stephanie.
When I return she is fast asleep on the couch, I take the computer off of her lap, tuck it under the coffee table, and place a blanket on top of her. It is 1 oclock on a Saturday, what to do, what to do. I know Lisa will wake up in a few hours, smoke some more pot, probably eat a sandwhich and dose back off to sleep after playing more video games, this is her usual routine on a good day. I figure its safe to call chuck my only single friend left and shoot the shit with him for the day. Chuck is smoking cigars and watching mud wrestling on television, that bastard, I tell him Ill be over as soon as I can.
Chuck is the ultimate bacholor, a real Van Wilder, it took him 8 years to finish college but when he did he became a self-made rich boy, a financial consultant. He flies all over the world on frequent flier miles, fucks beautiful women, gets money shoved in his pockets, and is still STD free that asshole. He's the type of man I never had the guts to be, he's a Hugh Hefner, he once had two girlfriends who knew about each other and he broke up with both of them at the same time and they just about did everything to get him back, even filmed themselves playing with dildos and moaning his name. Fuck that bastard. He was also my best man at my wedding, it was about the only time I ever heard him say anything half decent. He told me their was only one woman in the entire world that he ever met that could be worthy enough to tie a guy down to the grave, and that woman was Lisa and that I was damn lucky to have her.
"Damnit, I have to get that" I pull out of her tight pussy and grab the phone.
"What the f..." I slap my hand over her face and whisper "shhhhhh!"
"Good afternoon Law Offices of Mac and O'Riley"
"Hunny?" It's Lisa.
"Hey hunny are you okay?"
"No, Jamie can you please come home? It's real bad and I am scared, I don't want to be alone." She puts down the phone to yak into the toilet something fierce.
"Of course. I'll leave right away, I love you." I hang up the phone and grab my coat.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" My girlfriend Stephanie can be a real bitch.
"What do you think I'm doing? My wife is having a bad day, I have to go."
"So you're just going to leave me still wetting my pants?" God, I love it when she talks like that, I'm still hard and all I wanna do is lay her across my desk and finish fucking her.
"I'm sorry, you know I'll make it up to you" I leave her in my office and walk out the door.
I arrive home and Lisa's choking on her vomit, I panic but she relieves herself before I have to jam my fingers down her throat and scoop out the bile. She looks at me with those big brown apologetic eyes, god can those eyes still kill. I stroke her skeletal back and whip the sweat from her brows, and tell her she's going to be okay. An hour later their is nothing left and she is weak and nodding off to sleep. I pick her up and lay her down on the couch where I can keep an eye on her while I fix some vegetable soup. I get a call from the doctor who asks how she's feeling after her treatment. "Fucken horrible, she just puked for an hour and now she's too weak to stay awake" I am frustrated, tired, and agitated by my blue balls, I take it out on him. He's use to it and just tells me what he always says, to keep her hydrated and fed. Sounds easy coming from him.
Lisa wakes up long enough to make a deal with me, she'll sip half a bowl of soup and a full glass of water and I'll rub her back and sing our wedding song while she falls asleep. She smiles at me but I have to look away, her teeth are stained and beginning to rot. She picks up on it and tells me when she beats the cancer she's going to get beautiful veneers. That girl always picks up on everything, she use to be able to tell what kind of day I had just by the greeting I'd give her when I came home every day after work. When we were kids I'll never forget the time we were waking through the mall and all I did was glance at this guitar in the window of a music shop and during Christmas she bought it for me along with a Guitar for Dummys book. She said I made this funny sigh when I saw it that day in the mall like "man I wish I could learn how to play guitar." By Valentine's Day I had learned how to play a decent song and I dedicated to her and played it for her at a cheesy open mic night at a local venue. She loved it so much she insisted it become our wedding song, god it was so easy to please that girl, this girl.
Saturday morning comes and I sleep in until I hear the doorbell at 11. I glance over and Lisa isn't beside me, I listen for a moment and I hear her heading to the door.
"Chase, come on in" it's fucken Chase.
"Hey Lisa, how's it going, you look pretty good." I'm guessing she must have her blonde wig on, God dammit do I hate that thing.
"Oh, thanks, not feeling so hot after chemo yesterday but thanks. Do you want anything to eat or drink?"
"No, no, I'm good actually, is Jamie home? His car is outside."
"Yeah, he's still asleep actually believe it or not, I bet he'd love to see you though, do you want me to go grab him?" No actually I wouldn't love to see him, I beg to christ she doesn't start calling my name.
"No, no, that's okay, I gotta get going anyway, I am meeting someone for lunch. You can just tell him I said hi. How much did you say you wanted again?"
"Just the same as last time, same price right?"
"This stuff is from Vermont but for you I'll keep it at the same price" How nice of him.
"Thanks Chase, I appreciate it."
"Alright, well I hope you start feeling better, call me if you need anything"
"Oh I will, thanks Chase, you outta come by for dinner sometime when I am feeling a little more stable, you can bring a girl too if you're seeing anyone."
"Okay, yeah" I imagine their hugging about now.
"Thanks again, see ya"
"Peace"
I roll out of bed and jog downstairs before she can hide away her pot. I don't want her to escape any guilt. "Your drug dealer just come by?"
"Jamie, it was Chase, he's not my drug dealer, he's our friend"
"Your friend, not mine anymore, not my friend since we were kids." I enter the kitchen and start making breakfast.
"Come on Jamie, this stuff really helps, you know that. I hardly have an appetite without it, and it calms my stomach" She wraps her arms around me and hugs my back.
"You don't need pot Lisa. I got you to eat yesterday and you didn't even yak it back up."
"Yeah hunny but that was after I spent the entire afternoon yaking already" she reaches in a kitchen drawer and pulls out a bowl to pack her pot in. She retreats to the outside back patio to smoke and I surrender the discussion to a bowl of oatmeal.
When she returns she eats a bowl of cereal and a banana and forgets to engage in conversation. We sit silent at the kitchen table. I clean the dishes when we are both finished while she plops herself down on the sofa couch and plays a game on her laptop. She doesn't speak, she doesn't move, she doesn't hear me when I ask her to go for a walk. I put on some gym shorts, go for a long jog and think about fucking Stephanie.
When I return she is fast asleep on the couch, I take the computer off of her lap, tuck it under the coffee table, and place a blanket on top of her. It is 1 oclock on a Saturday, what to do, what to do. I know Lisa will wake up in a few hours, smoke some more pot, probably eat a sandwhich and dose back off to sleep after playing more video games, this is her usual routine on a good day. I figure its safe to call chuck my only single friend left and shoot the shit with him for the day. Chuck is smoking cigars and watching mud wrestling on television, that bastard, I tell him Ill be over as soon as I can.
Chuck is the ultimate bacholor, a real Van Wilder, it took him 8 years to finish college but when he did he became a self-made rich boy, a financial consultant. He flies all over the world on frequent flier miles, fucks beautiful women, gets money shoved in his pockets, and is still STD free that asshole. He's the type of man I never had the guts to be, he's a Hugh Hefner, he once had two girlfriends who knew about each other and he broke up with both of them at the same time and they just about did everything to get him back, even filmed themselves playing with dildos and moaning his name. Fuck that bastard. He was also my best man at my wedding, it was about the only time I ever heard him say anything half decent. He told me their was only one woman in the entire world that he ever met that could be worthy enough to tie a guy down to the grave, and that woman was Lisa and that I was damn lucky to have her.
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